Ivy's Funeral Wake and Burial

Monday, July 6, 2015

A rainy day. Aubrey and her schoolmates were sent home after lunch due to the storm in the north. L. delivered the additional 75 sacks of garden soil that we need for our plant boxes. Three of M.'s men and two of D.'s boys assisted me. I worked only whenever the rain stopped. Later in the afternoon the men and the boys decided to take off their shirts and continue working in the pouring rain, Done in three hours--but, we need 30 more sacks of garden soil!

Angelique went to the hospital to affix her signature on papers needed to obtain Ivy's death certificate. Ivy's relatives then had the cadaver transported to Masantol, Pampanga, where it was embalmed and coffined for the wake.

J. arrived to send the night with Angelique and Aubrey. We ordered pizza. They plated cards the whole night. I must have played two or three Hercule Poirot DVDs before turning in. My TV was tuned to CNN Absolutely through dawn.


Tuesday, July 7, 2015

The alarm woke me at 4:00 AM. The goddess of the storm is my mother, Not a drop of rain and, in a few hours, the sun would be scorching hot. We fed and watered Cerefina, Kichiro, and the birds before locking up. The car we rented arrived 4:30. We left Cubao at 5:15 and had a substantial breakfast at the Petron stop on the NLEx. Our route brought us through Tabang Exit to Malolos and Calumpit, and then Apalit, Macabebe, and Masantol, We saw the mortuary early on but drove round the plaza in search of a hotel. Deja vu: It is the same mortuary where my former co-worker Teen had held father's funeral wake a few years ago.

As it turned out, there are no hotels in Masantol because it is considered a dead end that looks out onto Manila Bay. There are no hotels in San Nicolas and Macabebe either. We stopped briefly at the mortuary. Ivy's and M.'s relations were there. They did an excellent job of dressing up Ivy in an embroidered, formal gown, and having her hair and make-up done. We were the first to sign the guest book.

The closest hotel we found was in Apalit. I paid for two adjoining rooms with a connecting door in between. After taking in our bags we stopped for ice cream in the town plaza, bought sacks of snack food, and went back to the hotel. I read a few pages from a book and napped. My granddaughters and J. slept through 1:00 PM.

Lunch was at a fast food store a few meters away. We took out sandwiches for the group's supper just in case they wouldn't like the food that would be served inside the chapel. I told my granddaughters and J. to be back in the hotel by midnight so that they could have sufficient sleep before the funeral the following morning,

Everyone else proceeded to the mortuary. I asked to be dropped at the boundary between Apalit and Macabebe. A stretch of santo shops were located there. I almost bought myself two carved, wooden, santo heads, but refrained from doing so. Deja vu again; While waiting for a tricycle by the roadside a man on a delivery bike stopped in front of me and asked whether our cafe in Cubao was now completely done. I had to do a double take before recognizing him as one of B.'s men who worked on our iron grilles. I informed him that Ivy had passed away, which was why I was in Apalit. He was utterly shocked. A tricycle pulled up before I decided that I could use him to do some more iron work for us. I sensed, however, that we would cross paths again someday.

Back at the hotel I did some reading and writing. Tomorrow morning would be the next time I'd be back at the mortuary, before the funeral. The goddess of the storm is also the goddess of cemeteries. I am prohibited from going to places of death as much as possible. I knitted the rest of the afternoon, downed a Gatorade and a Nestea, and ate a hotel supper alone.

The granddaughters and J. came to the hotel unexpectedly early that night. The mortuary was crowded and filled with many of Ivy's relatives, most of whom my granddaughters hadn't met till then. Angelique's schoolmates were scheduled to arrive at the mortuary after midnight, and so they decided to nap through 10:00 PM, go back to the mortuary, and stay there through the morning. At 9:00 PM my sisters Remi and Alice, R., Alice's house companion, and E., a compound tenant, were already en route from Cubao to Pampanga. They asked Angelique, on her cell phone, to book an additional two hotel rooms for them. I slept early and woke up briefly at dawn only to find out that my granddaughters, J., and the driver went back to the mortuary at 1:00 AM and that my sisters and their company had gone to the mortuary before check into the rooms beside ours.

Deja vu: I recall conducting a "Writing from The Heart" workshop here a few years back.

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

After breakfast at the hotel we all met up at the mortuary. Mass was celebrated and was followed by a ritual blessing. Do I really look too weird? I lined up to kiss the priest's hand before he left, and he asked me, "Kamag-anak ka ba?" The funeral hearse, waiting outside the chapel, turned on its music. Flowers and balloons were placed on top of it. My granddaughters followed the coffin through the time it was taken inside the hears. It was then that I saw them truly overcome with grief--this was the first death in their immediate family. They walked behind the hearse all the way to the cemetery, along with J. and some 50 relatives and friends, some of whom had traveled all the way from Manila to pay their last respects.

It was at this time that Ivy must have pulled a prank on everyone: the rain poured as though on cue, and everyone had no choice but to patiently trudge through the flooded streets to the cemetery. After the funeral my granddaughters changed into shorts and took off their shoes. We checked out of the hotel at 11:00 PM. Pending my checking out other hotels in Apalit this is, tentatively, where we shall book our rooms every year to visit Ivy's grave.

Our trip home was uneventful. All of the heavy traffic was northbound, on the other side of every road we passed.

We all had a late lunch at Cafe Adriatico in Gateway before proceeding home.

Fredo's tricycle. I didn't recognize him quickly; he now has a wife and child. When he was 16 he was one of the staff members of Miranda's Cove, our family cafe.

We are all back home from an overnight stay in Pampanga for Ivy's wake and funeral.

Aubrey had to go get her medical certificate this evening; she needs it for her volleyball varsity membership. Angelique and Aubrey bought our supper at a Korean restaurant; we can't be bothered to cook tonight.

Benjie and his wife rode a bus all the way from Pampanga to Cubao. I am hoping that Benjie is well enough to work on our house tomorrow.

In the meantime tomorrow's classes in Pasig are already suspended.

My daughter-in-law Ivy passed away at 7:50 PM this evening. Her wake will be held in her hometown in Pampanga.

Ivy had been in a bad way for the past half-year, spending weeks in hospital and resting in the granddaughters' house in Cavite.

We wanted her cremated and her ashes placed in our columbarium, but her dying wish was to be buried beside her own grandparents, who took care of her since she was a child.

A very wet evening in Cubao.

Finished watching The Adventure of the Clapham Cook, which I'd neither read nor heard of since I was in grade school. I don't think a copy of this ever came to the Philippines. At any rate this was another short story rather than a novel. Interesting because it shows the interior of an English house in the country, so different from "American country" which Papemelroti tries too hard to simulate to the point of caricature.

Watched Murder in the Mews. Not very interesting. Nothing dramatic was at stake. It has the magnitude of a short story rather than a novel.

You can eat only three chocolates from a box in order to be satisfied. The fourth piece will make you feel dizzy and nauseated, and will spoil your enjoyment of the first three.

A bleak, gray, rainy day in Cubao--the kind of day I like, that I light incandescent bulbs to, that I set flowers in vases to, that I light scented candles to, that I open boxes of expensive chocolates to, that I pour tea in porcelain services to.

Back from lunch out and shopping with the granddaughters. One can never plan to buy everything one wants when one has teenage grandchildren--one suddenly learns that one must pay for a P5,000 pair of varsity team shoes, shampoo and flea powder for the pampered pet dog, and such.

Sunday, Sunday

Lunch out with the granddaughters.

Shopping and groceries.

To be able to forgive others, imagine them as helpless pet cats, pet dogs, or cute teddy bears.

Good morning, Cubao!

Rained last night. Chilly dawn. Cool morning.

Good night, Cubao!

Watched Taken at the Flood, which has Jenny Agutter, whom I last saw in Logan's Run when I was in college. This one isn't as interesting as the others. It is the most boring in the series so far, as a matter of fact. There are too many characters, present and absent, and the relationships are vague. The need for huge amounts of money and being in debt for huge amounts of money, if I may say so, are the corniest of situations, and I felt detached. No amount of of trying to achieve "dramatic" tension  or weeping or flirting by the performers could engage me.

Except for the last 30 minute of the film, but, by, then, all was practically lost.

Watched After the Funeral, which I enjoyed because some of the characters were into theater and painting.

The problem with love is that, after you have wised up to it, it is always too late.

Be a good father and grandfather to your own children and grandchildren, never to your friends and students.

Temporarily hooked on Italian, Sorini, chocolates that my sisters brought home from Australia. (When I myself was in Sydney I noted that there were many Italian immigrants; they typically operated delis, where I ate.)

Watched Cards on the Table. My favorite character, Ariadne Oliver, is in it. Gorgeous sets, crystal and silver dinner service, and jewelry. This production is  a lot of talk and little action, but I loved it anyway because I had many opportunities to look at the sets and props while everyone else was talking.

This was unusual, though, in that there are at least two (three?) male homosexual characters, five references to homosexuality, and two instances of homosexual blackmail through photography. I should mention, however, that in the first DVD I saw (A Hallowe'en Party), there was an affair between two lesbians.

It was still sunny after lunch, and so I worked on the second plant box. M. and his men assisted. M. imported men all the way from _____ to staff his cafe. Another batch of men is arriving tonight.

Looks good. The bad news is, I need 75 more sacks of garden soil.

Good day, Cubao!

We slept through the heavy morning rains. Now the sun is out again.

Lots of goodies from Australia. My sisters Remi and Alice touched down at 4:30 PM yesterday, and, due, to the Metro Manila traffic, arrived home 9:30 PM.

Good night, Cubao!

Watched Peril at End House. Enjoyed it, but ending was quite tragic--I didn't remember how the book ended. Gorgeous sets.

Watched Hickory Dickory Dock and enjoyed it.

Angelique and J. went to Saint Paul Pasig to visit Angelique's former volleyball friends. They will possibly come back with Aubrey, after her last class.

In the meantime I went to the commercial center and bought stuff at the men's department of my favorite store, and then four unusual ice cube trays that I hope will be worth the money I paid for them.

We are neither sheep nor fish.

We are sentient human beings.

I have always believed, since grade school, that the image of a shepherd is a very bad simile for Jesus, especially when he is depicted retrieving a "lost" sheep.

We keep forgetting that penned sheep are fleeced, slaughtered, cooked, and eaten.

Sometimes, therefore, when prisoners yearn for freedom, manage jailbreaks, and flee, I find myself subconsciously rooting for them.

My jeweler called and wants to bring me something today.

Suddenly I'm thinking of that super-exquisite ruby set that I saw in Singapore but would have cost me half a million.

My sisters Remi and Alice are now en route from Sydney to Manila.

The worst firewall corruption of all is the window that pops up and says "Your Firewall Is Off". Like a 1950s door-to-door salesman it keeps popping up no matter how many times you close it.

You know you are in a Third World country when a high-ranking company has six or more telephone numbers and you have to patiently dial them one by one because most are busy, some have a voice tape that says, "Sorry, all circuits are busy now, please try again later," and others "The number you have dialed is incorrect."

Most people think that bad traffic is on the roads, forgetting all about telephone traffic.

Good morning, Cubao!

Waking up when one wants to, not when one has to, is a retired man's luxury.

Good night, Cubao!

Watched Murder in Mesopotamia, which has the same character types as those in Appointment With Death, perhaps because the settings, excavation digs, were most familiar to the author, whose husband was an archaeologist. The former is set in Iraq and Baghdad, the latter in Syria, where, alas, no one can do location shooting for now.

Love that cylinder seal. Appointment With Death, however, has many piquant urban settings.

Another thing I love about the Poirot series is that nothing in them is truly morbid, unlike what we see in other series that involve death.

Watched The Mystery of the Blue Train, perhaps a precursor of Murder on the Orient Express, but the characters, plot, and motive, of course, are different.

I love rubies--it's my granddaughter Aubrey's birthstone, too.

This production, uncannily, has Jaime Murray of Warehouse 13.

How I wish there were luxury trains in the Philippines that could take us for pleasant vacations to different regions!

Whenever I die and then live again, I look in the mirror and see that I am different--my face, my body, my clothing.

There are times when it is not what you know, how you speak, and how you behave that counts, but how much money you possess.

It is therefore best to have all of that, and I wonder why so many people cannot see it plainly.

Finished watching Lord Edgware Dies. Enjoyed it, especially since I forgot the original story from the book I'd read years ago.

Only I must have noticed that magnificent, silver repousse dip pen!

Part of the fun in gardening is digging your hands into the soil and getting yourself all covered with it.

M. dropped by to count the number of outlets, sockets, and switches inside the cafe area for the electrical engineering. He is working on an occupancy permit.

We are scheduled to open August 1, but we are in no rush in case it isn't ready to happen by that time.

Pasig Day. Aubrey has no school today. The granddaughters went to visit Ivy.

Worked on one plant box all by myself. Must have consumed ten sacks of garden soil. Replanted two rooted fortune plants and ficus cuttings. Looking good. Gardening is in every man's bones whenever the rains come.

Watched Anatomy of A Crime: The Body Parts Murder on Ci, set in Singapore in the mid-2000s, last night.

Good day, Cubao!

The garden people got me out of bed in mid-morning. Eighty sacks of garden soil and 20 sacks of loam arrived.

Watched The Hollow, which I remembered from the original novel because it has many good, quotable lines. This production features Sarah Miles (of Ryan's Daughter) and an intentional or unintentional Leslie Caron look-alike.

Unfortunately neither the director nor the actress portraying the sculptress knew anything about clay sculpture. No spatulas, no sponges--she used her bare hands!

It also behooves us to assume that the horse's head was not meant to be fired in a kiln!

Audiences have become shot-wise--or, at least, I have--meaning that film has developed conventions that filmmakers cannot escape from. I can tell when a shot is not going to be the ending shot of a film, and I can tell when a shot is.

Good night, Cubao!

If the law does not punish the criminal, something else will.

Watched Sad Cypress. Enjoyed it as much as I did the original novel on paper.

Amazing how many people now view the Poirot series as period pieces, quickly forgetting that they were set in the author's contemporary time.

People who go to work everyday need a rest from time to time, but people who are retired never need a rest from rest.

More and more companies should open permanent employment opportunities outside of Metro Manila. It encourages employees to move to peaceful homes far away from the metropolis and free of traffic at all times of the day and night.

I have observed that there are two major causes of bipolarism:

--Being constantly surrounded by atchays.
--Suffering through traffic and developing mental road rage.

Watched Evil Under the Sun, which I enjoyed on-screen as I enjoyed it on paper.

Watched Third Girl, not one of Agatha Christie's best, especially on paper. I love the character of Ariadne Oliver. She is a parody of all mediocre writers.

Never make a list of things that you dream of buying and owning. You will become a slave to that list, and all of your resources will be dictated by everything that is on it.

Try this: Make a list of ten items that you want to buy or own. Keep it for a week and note how the list controls your life.

After a week, cross out five items you believe you can give up on.

Note that you can actually live without those five items.

Then cross out the entire list and live your life with the many blessings that the universe sends your way.

On separate sprees in the commercial center my granddaughters and I tried three-fruit, blended, milkshakes and enjoyed them. We tried the same in our kitchen, where our senses are more focused, and found that we appreciate and enjoy one-fruit shakes a lot more.

My sister Lourdes retired from her job in Sydney, Australia yesterday, the last day of June. In Australia one can remain employed for as long as one likes--or, should I say, for as long as one can take it?--even if one lives to be a hundred.

I have always advised my sister to retire, though. As long as one has a pension, one should retire either upon reaching the mandatory age or retire as early as possible before that. If retiring from one's job is a form of death, living in retirement after it is a form of heaven.

Words and images can be Google-searched, but never one's innermost thoughts and feelings.

People with inflexible tongues pronounce the word "mirror" as "meer".

Whichever way you pronounce someone's name changes neither his genius nor his imbecility.

Does Crime Pay?

Heads-up: Already, a rich and powerful person is attempting to purchase David Sweat.

I thought that, in the spirit realm, he would be responsive only to pretty young females. As it turns out, he doesn't mind responding to men.

Good morning, Cubao!

Caught the final, second-restaurant, round on My Kitchen Rules Australia two nights ago.

There seems to be a correlation between personality and winning.

Good night, Cubao!

My love affair with Agatha Christie and Hercule Poirot resumed more than an hour ago with The Murder of Roger Ackroyd. I still do so admire British decor: dishes, shop signs, flowering shrubs, well-tended vines, and topiary. This one is mostly set in a gorgeous Art Deco house with black-and-white animal skins on the floors, lamps, giant tabletop plates, and a desk-top chromium panther.